So I tried this and I stumbled a little on the word loveable. I ended up with the word "empty". It wasn't in a negative way - almost like just a letting go? It felt Buddhist, maybe? Curious about your thoughts.
Empty is good! Is there a slight warmth accompanying the word for you? If so then great. If not then just notice the lack/if there are any parts that are blocking warmth for any reason, and get curious about them. Let me know you how get on!
What I got is that I'm tired of trying so hard to be loveable. Interesting, right?
Empty doesn't come with warmth but it does come with relief. Relief from expectation in part, I think. It means the ability to just put everything down for a bit.
I am experimenting with words.
I am worthy just as I am. I am loved just as I am.
Those are two that I'm working with now. I like I am loved. I think of it as Divine or universal love.
For several years I have been making sending Metta an almost daily practice. And each time I devote 5 minutes sending Metta to myself. It has made an enormous difference in my life. I am proof your Just As You Are indeed works!
Satya, I love this anti-resolution practice. Through the past several years of therapy and journaling, I've picked up on a big pattern of constantly doing things to prove myself. I often turn everything into a project; into another way to measure my performance and push myself just a liiiittle harder. I know I really need to focus on reminding myself that I'm intrinsically lovable. Thank you for sharing this so beautifully. P.S. Aiko is sooooo cute! 😍
Hi Brina - ah, great realisation, and I don't think you're the only one 😊 So glad the piece landed for you, and I've passed your compliment on to Aiko - she says thank you! Good to meet you.
I really like this. For the best part of a year I have kept a ‘Happiness Journal’ and every night before bed I write down a few things I am grateful for, something that went well that day and something I like about myself. I also write down anything I did that day that aligns with my core values. No matter how bad the day was, this always sends me to sleep in a better place.
Ah, thank you Shan that's very kind. It's so lovely when folk take the time to write and say when something has hit the sweet spot. Lovely to meet you.
Such sweetness and synchronicity here. I'm a seriously playful Parts Work person who shares tools for self-compassion, too. I call my parts Monkeys. Although I've loved them up for for years, they still surprise me! I look forward to learning your take on IFS and the blessings of loving one's whole self, as we are. (a meanie Monkey who is not always kind to my partner is not so easy to love these days!)
Hi Christine - lovely to meet a fellow Parts Worker! I love that - Monkeys. Yes, I know how that is!! Very lovely to have you here, and sending extra love to the one that's mean to your partner (and to the ones in your partner that get hurt as a result) - totally understandable that's not a popular one. Maybe this year it will be able to receive some healing. So good to meet you.
Beautiful. This year I challenged myself to consider every morning “when will I rest today?” - I think adding a little self compassion to this daily inquiry is just what I need. Thank you ❤️
Thank you for this considerate take on New Years resolutions!
For me what you recommended is almost like self-regulation task to actively engage with our emotional health capacity - I think it is great. Whether someone wants to add this to their meditation routine, journaling, walking or exercise sessions, or anything else where "flow" might happen a bit easier.
Personally, I am slowly allowing myself to see that I am lovable to the fullest just as I am (luckily and thankfully, I do have the greatest possible partner in my wife who reminds me about that daily). Ironically, it is easier for me nowadays to see and accept that externally, while internally I am still sometimes even fighting with the idea of "loving myself".
I will sit and think about when and how I might want to add your suggestions to my days (currently my morning puppy walk seems like a good idea... ).
Welcome Marcin - lovely to have you here. Yes, a kind of stretching those muscles I guess... although I also see it as something a little more mystical - who knows where the just-as-you-are magic comes from and how it might affect us. I love the sound of a just-as-you-are puppy walk - I'm sure your puppy accepts you like that! I'm going to take five minutes of my usual morning meditation to do mine. I hope you accompany us it'd be lovely to hear how you get on. 🙏🏻
Haha, yes my puppies and ponies seem to have just the right kind of accept me as I am magic energy.
I do like that mystical aspect you mention, even despite being routed so strongly in science myself. There is so much that we are continuously figuring out, discovering and learning anew (a lot through science ironically!), that I am sure there is way more to that whole business of "life" than we think.
It's funny - the only objection to this in my mind was, "I already know I'm loveable! I don't need to do that." But while I intellectually know it, I think I don't always embody it. Thank you for the reminder, and the invitation to remind myself.
That's 'parts' for you! I have lots of parts that really get this, and some that REALLY don't. These ones are often more hidden away, so I like the idea of it soaking in through all of me, and reaching some of those forgotten, lonely, afraid parts of me... like giving the garden a really good water!
When I picked my word for 2024 I picked the word “better.” For me it represents small incremental improvements rather than trying to set guidelines that make me judge myself a failure if they fall by the wayside. I think this modest step will fit nicely into my plan to be just a bit better at accepting myself. That would be better wouldn’t it? 🙏🪷
I love this reshaping of New Year’s resolutions! Our society encourages to spend so much time thinking about our flaws, but our beauty is in our uniqueness and fullness. Definitely sharing this with my community!
Ah, thanks Sam. Yes, I'm constantly having to remind myself of these things - celebrating who we already are, knowing that there are good reasons for our flaws, etc etc... I do hope your community finds it helpful 😊
Ironically though I have set some intentions for next year, many of them are about loving me as me or trusting myself to be enough to do certain things. Like finally actually teaching yoga. I’m just fine enough as I am at yoga to guide others, I don’t need to be polished or perfect or [insert other thing] 💜
So I tried this and I stumbled a little on the word loveable. I ended up with the word "empty". It wasn't in a negative way - almost like just a letting go? It felt Buddhist, maybe? Curious about your thoughts.
Empty is good! Is there a slight warmth accompanying the word for you? If so then great. If not then just notice the lack/if there are any parts that are blocking warmth for any reason, and get curious about them. Let me know you how get on!
What I got is that I'm tired of trying so hard to be loveable. Interesting, right?
Empty doesn't come with warmth but it does come with relief. Relief from expectation in part, I think. It means the ability to just put everything down for a bit.
I am experimenting with words.
I am worthy just as I am. I am loved just as I am.
Those are two that I'm working with now. I like I am loved. I think of it as Divine or universal love.
For several years I have been making sending Metta an almost daily practice. And each time I devote 5 minutes sending Metta to myself. It has made an enormous difference in my life. I am proof your Just As You Are indeed works!
Hurray for that Fran! I think sending Metta to ourselves often gets missed out in spiritual practice - in my opinion it's so important...
Satya, I love this anti-resolution practice. Through the past several years of therapy and journaling, I've picked up on a big pattern of constantly doing things to prove myself. I often turn everything into a project; into another way to measure my performance and push myself just a liiiittle harder. I know I really need to focus on reminding myself that I'm intrinsically lovable. Thank you for sharing this so beautifully. P.S. Aiko is sooooo cute! 😍
Hi Brina - ah, great realisation, and I don't think you're the only one 😊 So glad the piece landed for you, and I've passed your compliment on to Aiko - she says thank you! Good to meet you.
Love this! I'm definitely in. And the part of me that fears it'll fizzle out and come to nothing is lovable just as he is too.
Yay! and double yay 😊
I really like this. For the best part of a year I have kept a ‘Happiness Journal’ and every night before bed I write down a few things I am grateful for, something that went well that day and something I like about myself. I also write down anything I did that day that aligns with my core values. No matter how bad the day was, this always sends me to sleep in a better place.
Love your journal Ben - drawing out the good - our brains are so good at doing the opposite... good to meet you & thanks for reading!
This was a gift to read. Just beautiful. Thank you.
Ah, thank you Shan that's very kind. It's so lovely when folk take the time to write and say when something has hit the sweet spot. Lovely to meet you.
Such sweetness and synchronicity here. I'm a seriously playful Parts Work person who shares tools for self-compassion, too. I call my parts Monkeys. Although I've loved them up for for years, they still surprise me! I look forward to learning your take on IFS and the blessings of loving one's whole self, as we are. (a meanie Monkey who is not always kind to my partner is not so easy to love these days!)
Hi Christine - lovely to meet a fellow Parts Worker! I love that - Monkeys. Yes, I know how that is!! Very lovely to have you here, and sending extra love to the one that's mean to your partner (and to the ones in your partner that get hurt as a result) - totally understandable that's not a popular one. Maybe this year it will be able to receive some healing. So good to meet you.
Beautiful. This year I challenged myself to consider every morning “when will I rest today?” - I think adding a little self compassion to this daily inquiry is just what I need. Thank you ❤️
What a lovely practice - the perfect antidote to our capitalist colonialist society. And yes, a dash of just-as-you-are may be a great addition 😊
Thank you for this considerate take on New Years resolutions!
For me what you recommended is almost like self-regulation task to actively engage with our emotional health capacity - I think it is great. Whether someone wants to add this to their meditation routine, journaling, walking or exercise sessions, or anything else where "flow" might happen a bit easier.
Personally, I am slowly allowing myself to see that I am lovable to the fullest just as I am (luckily and thankfully, I do have the greatest possible partner in my wife who reminds me about that daily). Ironically, it is easier for me nowadays to see and accept that externally, while internally I am still sometimes even fighting with the idea of "loving myself".
I will sit and think about when and how I might want to add your suggestions to my days (currently my morning puppy walk seems like a good idea... ).
Welcome Marcin - lovely to have you here. Yes, a kind of stretching those muscles I guess... although I also see it as something a little more mystical - who knows where the just-as-you-are magic comes from and how it might affect us. I love the sound of a just-as-you-are puppy walk - I'm sure your puppy accepts you like that! I'm going to take five minutes of my usual morning meditation to do mine. I hope you accompany us it'd be lovely to hear how you get on. 🙏🏻
Haha, yes my puppies and ponies seem to have just the right kind of accept me as I am magic energy.
I do like that mystical aspect you mention, even despite being routed so strongly in science myself. There is so much that we are continuously figuring out, discovering and learning anew (a lot through science ironically!), that I am sure there is way more to that whole business of "life" than we think.
I love this Satya. Thank you so much for offering this practice. I look forward to weaving it in. 💫
Yay!
This is gorgeous. Thank you so much for sharing Satya 🙏🏽💖
Thanks Miguel - I'm glad you think so! I'm just passing on what others have passed to me...
It's funny - the only objection to this in my mind was, "I already know I'm loveable! I don't need to do that." But while I intellectually know it, I think I don't always embody it. Thank you for the reminder, and the invitation to remind myself.
That's 'parts' for you! I have lots of parts that really get this, and some that REALLY don't. These ones are often more hidden away, so I like the idea of it soaking in through all of me, and reaching some of those forgotten, lonely, afraid parts of me... like giving the garden a really good water!
This is an excellent practice. Thank you.
When I picked my word for 2024 I picked the word “better.” For me it represents small incremental improvements rather than trying to set guidelines that make me judge myself a failure if they fall by the wayside. I think this modest step will fit nicely into my plan to be just a bit better at accepting myself. That would be better wouldn’t it? 🙏🪷
Fits perfectly!!! And what a lovely thing to get better at.
I love this reshaping of New Year’s resolutions! Our society encourages to spend so much time thinking about our flaws, but our beauty is in our uniqueness and fullness. Definitely sharing this with my community!
Ah, thanks Sam. Yes, I'm constantly having to remind myself of these things - celebrating who we already are, knowing that there are good reasons for our flaws, etc etc... I do hope your community finds it helpful 😊
Ironically though I have set some intentions for next year, many of them are about loving me as me or trusting myself to be enough to do certain things. Like finally actually teaching yoga. I’m just fine enough as I am at yoga to guide others, I don’t need to be polished or perfect or [insert other thing] 💜
Ah, so this fits perfectly! (and I know you are too - you will be amazing - it's just parts of you that haven't caught up yet!) xxx