The Definitive Guide to Going Gently

What kind of beautiful plant are you?

Temple garden with dahlias by Floor Nijman

Hello lovelies. Here is what I know about going gently.

⭐ We are usually more gentle with others than we are with ourselves. ⭐ Much of the world is against us as it pushes us to work, spend, do or be more. ⭐ The parts of us that push us think that they are helping. ⭐ It’s not always easy to change, but even a teensy bit of space or a slight slowing can provide a lot of relief. And most importantly: ⭐ there are things we can do to help ourselves. ⭐

What can we do if we are sick and tired of too-intense, too-busy, too-much? Here are five things. But wait - before we begin, I’d like you to step out into the garden or into your favourite green space in your mind’s eye. Hey presto! You are now a plant! Ready? (I’ll add links to extra pieces as I write them so you can explore…)

1. Read your label (know yourself). What kind of plant are you? What seed did you grow from? How have you adapted to your history and your current circumstances? How does this knowledge about yourself help? (Get to know your parts, On my hands and knees at the dog bowl, The courage to be grumpy.)

2. Find good soil (choose good conditions). What sorts of places nourish you? What conditions are extra-difficult for you? How can you get yourself into those good conditions?

3. Add water (give yourself what you need). What do you need to thrive? How often? How much? Who, what, when? How often do you forget to add water, and why?

4. Be the plant you are (be yourself). Would you expect a daisy to produce a peony flower, or nettles not to sting? What boundaries do you need to set, which losses do you need to grieve? What do you want? How can you celebrate your glorious uniqueness?

5. Remember the sun (connect with infinite love). The sun is always there, shining on you. Sometimes it is hidden behind clouds and you might lose faith in it. It never loses sight of you. What helps you to remember the sun, or maybe to even discover it for the first time?

So: read your label - know yourself. Find good soil - choose good conditions. Add water - give yourself what you need. Be the plant you are - be yourself. Remember the sun - connect with infinite love. (Here’s how that last one makes me feel.)

My invitation to you. Over the next five months I will help you grow towards more clarity, kindness and calm. I’ll riff on each of our themes with stories from my life here at the temple, wisdom from Internal Family Systems, nature, dogs, and good cake… There will be questions for you to journal or ponder, Gentle voice notes, Friday Loveliness, a place to share your experience & other goodies.

Friends of Going Gently (paid subscribers) will receive all this - sign up below. If you’re not sure whether you should give me money or not, maybe read this. If you’d rather sit a little further back for now that’s also completely fine and you are VERY welcome - you’ll still receive occasional messages which I hope will be helpful.

I am vibrating gently with excitement. Nothing makes me happier than sharing the good stuff I’ve received, playing with words, and learning as I go… that’s just the kinda plant I am. Can you see my chlorophyll glowing?

Go gently,
Satya <3

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Questions to ponder: What is alive in you as you read this reflection? How can you nurture that curiosity or excitement or sense of possibility? What inside you turns away? What concerns do you have about getting to know what kind of plant you are, feeding yourself something different or finding a different plot? How can you bring kindness to the process of learning to go more gently?

And maybe you know someone who might appreciate this reflection as a nudge towards slowing down and soaking in more of the good stuff? Be generous: